Frank Schmyder Investigates… ‘A Goon in Britball – The Nathan Webb Story’

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Hiya folks, Frank here!

Nathan Webb, South Wales Warriors and the discipline panel of BAFA. Grab a brew, pull up a chair and settle in, Frankie’s got some questions.

I’ve just been on the blower to a pal who tells me that in the 2019 post season, British American Football was trying out a crossover with ice hockey, allowing teams to employ one ‘goon’ on the squad. The goon’s role is to have nothing to do with the play and have absolutely zero skills aside from trying to hurt people with complete disregard for the other rules involved in football. In order to be effective in causing maximum damage, the goon should have a history of violence away from the pitch and preferably against vulnerable people.

You’d be forgiven in thinking that old Frankie was talking utter bollocks here, but apparently this was a thing… or at least it looked like it.

Here’s some footage from South Wales Warriors vs London Blitz B in the 2019 Div 2 semi-final. Let me set the scene; it’s the division two semis, the QB for Blitz B is playing a sport, handing the ball off, throwing it about a bit and then some clown decides to snot him in an obvious attempt to injure him. Nathan – contact us if we’re getting any of this wrong, but I don’t think we are. He doesn’t just snot him once, he does it again, and again, and again. Now, Frank agrees with Vince Lombardi when he said ‘this isn’t a contact sport, it’s a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport.’ People do get their piece of pie in football, but what goes through your head to think that this was acceptable in an amateur game…?

Although to be fair, snotting a QB half an hour after the ball’s gone is nothing if you think choking out your boss, who is smaller and almost ten years younger than you, is funny.

This BBC article explains that she had injuries caused by nerve damage or lack of oxygen to the brain, and hit her head against the fridge when he dropped her. Again, Nathan, if we and the BBC are wrong, give us a shout.

Now, the next bit, South Wales Warriors management. Knowing this guy and what he’s about, knowing he’s been targeting a player with an intent to cause injury, you’re happy to let him play the final which you then won? Was there any internal discipline or were you just happy to have the ‘goon’ on your squad to hopefully cause injury in the final?

Nate Webb of the South Wales Warriors | Pic: BBC

Now the ultimate stinger in this story… The BAFA discipline panel.

The reason Frankie is writing this up is because this came out in the BAFRA newsflash yesterday.

No description available.

“After the game, Mr Webb was charged and found guilty of committing 3 separate Flagrant Fouls during a game.”

He was banned for 3 games in 2021 but not the Div 2 final in 2019.

I can’t fault the referees in this one. From the videos, no one would’ve been looking at the QB as they would’ve been tracking the play. The only person that would’ve been watching the QB was the offending player as he hit him roughly 4 days after the play had gone.

There’s two questions Frankie wants answered; number one being, how come he wasn’t instantly banned on viewing that footage? If he had gone on and caused serious injury to someone in the final for employing the same bullshit tactics, who would’ve been held responsible?

The second being, three-game ban. THREE games! Mr Webb cleaned out a player who had nothing to do with the play with the sole intention of injuring him. How does that look to the good folk of Britball that pay to play on a Sunday afternoon and then go to work on Monday morning, knowing the punishments for this sort of thing is so light and so late?

Before folk kick off and say, “THEY’RE ONLY DOING THE BEST THEY CAN, IT’S AN AMATEUR LEAGUE RUN BY VOLUNTEERS!” I know this, which is why I’d appreciate someone contacting me to explain why it’s only a three-game ban, two years after the offence.

But anyway, in the meantime, Frank’s wondering if he boots some kids in the face and hides a shiv in his sock, if he’d get picked up by the South Wales Warriors to fill a gap against the Black Knights, the Bulls and the Storm this season. Call me.


P.S. Nate Webb has a history of extreme aggression and assault, this clip from the 2018 Britball season shows him violently attacking an opposing player trying to cause injury.

Comments (1)

Martin Knapp

I’d like to know if the league is putting itself before its players? Since Mr. Webb is allowed to return for any season at all, this makes the Head Coach, the GM, and the league culpable in all further behavior. The league should dismiss the player, and anyone turning a blind eye. Perhaps this is why there is a new head coach at the club?

While Mr. Webb will probably be visiting a prison cell at some point during his life, my hope is that it will come sooner rather than later, helped along by the good people involved in Britball.

Perhaps the league needs better committee members. They have my number, happy to volunteer or give them a proper steer.